Sunday, September 5, 2010

Piranha 3D (2010)

The only reason I went to see this thing is because I really dig 3D horror movies on the big screen with an audience. Even if the movie completely sucks I still usually have a good time while I'm there. I really wasn't expecting it to be any good because I always like the original better and this one isn't any different. The 70's original Joe Dante film is way better. I mean both films are pretty silly but this one just had some really stupid stuff going on, like these really bad action scenes where people are on jet skis killing piranha with shotguns. Or Ving Rhames taking on hundreds of cgi killer fish with a detached motorboat propeller. The one thing I will say about the 2010 remake is that there was plenty of blood and boobs. We got tons of big titted babes and a whole shit load of the red stuff and shredded skin. Some of the memorable scenes are a girl getting her hair caught in a propeller (causing her to lose her face), Another girl  loses half her body from the waist down and is flown around by a para sail, one dude rides over dozens of people in a motor boat (crushing skulls, and breaking bones), Eli Roth gets decapitated by a moving boat in a really splattery scene and then we have my favorite part where a man is pulled out of the water and hes missing almost all the skin on his legs and all he has to say is "They took my penis". That line really had me laughing. We even get to see a Piranha eat his 3D penis and spit it out. Another thing I thought was really cool was a 3D vomit scene. (that was kinda unique). The main complaint I have is all the cgi. In some scenes you really couldn't see what was happening due to the fast moving cg fish and the red blood spraying everywhere but the movie is worth catching before it leaves theaters. Once it hits video I wouldn't even waste my time.


  1. This may have been the goriest animals-gone-wild movie ever. I was trying to think of one that was bloodier but I couldn't.

  2. hmmmm good point. Im gonna keep thinking about this now. If I come up with anything I will let ya know but yeah it probably is the goriest.