Thursday, December 15, 2011
Nightmare On Dyke Street (1992)
Aside from the obnoxious Christmas decorations, Freddy doesn't really do much and for some reason he wears a long black wig. I don't know if this is supposed to mean that Freddy is a lesbian because there is no fucking dialogue in the movie other then the occasional moan and groan. Maybe he is supposed to be a woman, after all the movie is called A Nightmare On "Dyke" Street. Lesbian or not Freddy sports anal beads instead of knives for fingers but never puts them to use. Instead he/she just rubs them on women's ass and clits. Who the fuck thought this thing up? Three directors are credited for this thing which is even more embarrassing. One of them is to blame for Halloweenie which I am yet to see but Dyke Street is really pulling me in the opposite direction.
As if this isn't all weird enough we also have a bit of racism thrown into a scene where a bunch of white students make fun of their black teacher and shout out "Hammer time" constantly. They also draw a picture of a man with a huge Afro on the blackboard with an arrow going to his penis. Captioned underneath it says "Hammer time". Next the black teacher strips down to nothing but his belt and screws one of his students as Freddy watches. We also have a bunch of audio taken from Full Metal Jacket which is mixed into the shitty techno soundtrack.
It is a hell of a task to make it through A Nightmare On Dyke Street in one sitting and I strongly recommend staying far away from this grabastic piece of amphibian shit.